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[personal profile] divinemadam
Well, it's been forever since I updated, so I thought that I would take a few minutes to blather on about my life. Feel free to skip if you wish.

Work has been kicking my ass lately. I have been so exhausted when I come home from work that I eat dinner and usually fall asleep shortly after that. I am supposed to get off of work at 3:30 but I am usually at the office until 6:00 or later every day. I still bring work home with the best of intentions to try to get caught up, but it usually just ends up taking a car ride back and forth. That's the biggest reason that I haven't posted. My weekends have become recovery times for me.

Living with my brother has been good. We have a routine, and I do mother him somewhat because I am the one who cooks all of the time. I like to cook, so that doesn't bother me and I have to eat anyway. He does all of the yard work and most of the cleaning. He's borderline OCD, so he is actually better at cleaning than I am. The only cleaning that I usually do that he is more than happy to let me do is the laundry. Since I have to have clean clothes too, adding his to the mix isn't a big deal. He still goes and does things with his friends and I do things with my friends when I have the energy. Of course, we do family things too. We have been trying to get the house in order after me moving in. We got most of the house in order because we decided to have a Halloween Party which went well. Whenever I can find the cord that connects my camera to the computer, I will upload pictures. He dressed up as Alex from A Clockwork Orange and I was Galinda from the musical Wicked. It was a good night and not an awful lot of cleanup afterward. We had more cleanup from the Nor'Easter that just went through and caused Virginia to be put into a state of emergency. Today was the first day that we could walk on the grass and not get stuck in the mud. We have a small pile of wood from broken tree limbs. We also have a boat that washed up into the back yard, and we aren't really sure what to do about it. After all, a boat is hardly your normal type of debris. We are going to report it to the police and see what happens. The final thing that we need to do to get things how we want them around the house is to clear out the garage of things that we put there during the storm. Once that's done, we are going to set up a gym in there. We have a treadmill, a nautilus machine, an Ab Rocker, free weights, and an exercise ball. Derek wants to build an exercise bench too. He also wants to run cable outside so we can have a tv out there to watch as we exercise and so I can do exercise videos with enough space to move. We'll see how it goes.

In addition to feeding my brother, I have become the nurturer of the cats. Both of them will follow me around mewling until I feed them. When they hear my alarm go off in the morning, they come to scratch at the door for me. They also like to go into the bathroom with me when I go. Don't ask me why, but they will follow me almost every time. If they don't come into the bathroom with me, they will wait outside the door. The smaller of the cats, Squeak, always wants to love on me and smoosh face with me. Every evening, he will climb all over me until he gets my undivided attention, gets comfortable and starts making biscuits, doing that kneading thing that cats do. If I move, he moves with me. If I leave him, he looks at me and squeaks, thus being his name. His original name was Mowmowski, but that is a stupid name. I renamed him with something makes sense. He's a good kitten over all, but he likes to pee on two chairs. He knows that he is supposed to go in the litter box, but I think he does it to mark territory. He was a feral kitten originally and someone took him in. However, he had a tumor on his eye, so the guy he owned him took him into the vet to have it euthanized. One of the vet assistants decided to keep it and just have the eye removed, which is the only way to keep the tumor from spreading to the brain. The vet assistant couldn't keep the cat because her mother wouldn't allow it, so we inherited the cat. However, Derek wants to get rid of the kitten because the vet assistant in question is his ex-girlfriend.

That leads me into the next big issue that is ongoing in my life. I said in my last post that his girlfriend stated that she was pregnant. Well, she is and for a little over a month, she lived with us because her mother kicked her out of the house. She planned on having an abortion and Derek wanted to keep her with us to make sure that it would happen. It got so bad for my brother emotionally while she was living here, he couldn't even pretend to care about her. He couldn't look at her any longer, so she went to see a friend of hers, came back, and announced that she was keeping the baby. She moved back home since her mother had no problem with her being pregnant. Derek has been a mess most of the time ever since. He was suicidal for a while, which put a drain on everyone in the family. Lee, aka psycho kitty, stopped talking to Derek, which helped some. We looked into what could be done legally. Derek has no interest in being a father to her child. Yes it is his child too, but as far as he is concerned, he was just a sperm donor. He has tried to resign himself to the fact that he will probably be paying child support, but he can deal with that as ling as he never has to see psycho kitty again. He will give up his rights to the child so he doesn't have visitation. He will set up payments through child support services. If she thinks that having this child will keep him in her life, she has another thing coming. We have all tried to tell her this, but she won't believe that he doesn't want anything to do with the child unless he says it himself. He doesn't respond to her e-mails or texts. He tried to explain it, but it was no use. All she got out of the whole text conversation was that Derek was angry with her for breaking up with him. Where in the hell she got that, we have no idea. When I say that she is psychotic, I do mean it. That girl is not in touch with reality and her view of the situation is so skewed, it's not funny. She is due in April, and the best that we can hope for is that she loses the baby. No child needs to have her as a mother. The next best thing is that she allows Derek to legally give up his rights and not pay child support. She e-mailed my sister and told her that if Derek wants nothing to do with the child, she would leave him alone and not make him pay child support. However, with her mental instability, who knows if that will be true. Apparently, according to her Facebook page, she is dating someone else. Maybe that will help, but the fact is that she is still contacting people in our family to try to get updates on him. We've all told her politely, that we are respecting Derek's wishes and having nothing to do with her. Any prayers that anyone can send his way, we'd appreciate it.

The final thing that I wanted to tell everyone about is my trip to Arlington to see Beecake. That was the highlight of my life in the last two months! It was soooo good. I met Kirsty and Sandi who run the QueenBee myspace website. They were awesome and super nice to let me join into their conversation. I was there on my own, so it was nice to have someone to talk to while waiting for the band to start. The best thing is that it was a small venue, and I was there to see the band set up. After they finished their sound check, Billy walked by and said hello to Kirsty and Sandi. They introduced me to him, and he was very polite and congenial. He was also sporting a beard, which I found very becoming. Not everyone can wear a beard, but he most definitely can. (Again, when I can find the stupid camera cord, I will post pictures.) The show was phenomenal. I wish that there were more people there though. Oddly, I think that over half of the people there were from the Hampton Roads area, where I live. I think that if Beecake ever plays on the East Coast again, they should hit the Hampton Roads area, not Northern Virginia. It's a different feel up there. People are more focused on getting ahead, politics, and work. I tried to explain that to Kirsty and Sandi. They couldn't believe how small the crowd was. I told them that I felt strongly that if the concert had been in the Hampton Roads area, the crowd would have been much bigger. After all, the kind of people who live around beaches are much more laid back and are more than willing to go to concerts in the middle of the week, even if they have to go to work the next day. Believe me, I have seen lots of people going into work hung over because of a concert or party. Hell, I've done it. (Not a good idea when you work with kids. They know when you are hungover.) Anyway, the show was amazing and the music was moving and wonderful. After the show, they sold cd's and t-shirts. I got both and in the process, talked with John, the drummer. He is utterly adorable. He was witty and charming. He told me that he liked my hair and that he could see that I really liked the music since I was in his visual range. We chatted for a bit because I was the last person in line. They started breaking down the set, and lots of people surrounded Billy. I was tempted to join the group, but I saw his face. He looked so tired and I couldn't bring myself to being part of the cause that made him look that way. He was gracious to everyone that was around him though. As I was finishing my last beer, I said goodbye to Kirtsy and Sandi and then got hit on by this old guy who kept having conversations with my breasts. He was obviously trying to be cool by coming to see the band, and he bought a beer for Billy. Of course the idiot then took it to John, but I didn't say anything because John deserved a beer too, right? Not to mention that when creepy old guy started to make his move on me, literally stepping into my personal space, John came over and gave me a Beecake button. I talked with him a bit more at that time and then ran to the bathroom to get away from the creepy dude. It worked fortunately. I waited until the creepy guy left and then left myself. I have to say that while there were still enough people on the streets that I felt comfortable walking on my own, it was pretty empty for such a place filled with bars. I can't think of many places like that around here. Just another difference between the areas. Oh well, Billy or any other member of Beecake, if you are reading this, you need to play in the Hampton Roads area if you come back to the East Coast. You would have a better reception here.


I think that is pretty much it. I need to run so I can get ready to have dinner with a good friend this evening.

Date: 2009-11-15 11:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] waqaychay.livejournal.com
oh, honey, i'm so sorry about your brother. i, too, hope the psycho chick lets him give up his rights. i really think that's the best thing for him to do. if he doesn't want this child and he wants her out of his life permanently, it really is the only way. my love and support go out to both of you. ♥

Date: 2009-11-17 04:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] divinemadam.livejournal.com
Thanks. We can use all the support we can get. PK (psycho kitty) tried to find ways to insinuate herself into his life, even if it is just to send him text messages to tell him that she won't send him more messages and she misses him. I can tell when she has been in contact with him because he will be a mess for a few weeks after that. We really have to work to get him through it.

Date: 2009-11-19 02:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] waqaychay.livejournal.com
i have a friend who's dealing with the same kind of woman. unfortunately, he's married to her. it's nearly impossible for him to get rid of her. i really hope your brother has better luck. and at least he has you. you're a good sister. *hugs*

i can't wait to see you in person so i can give you a big hug in person.

Date: 2009-11-16 03:11 am (UTC)
alassenya: Mallorn leaf with Alassenya in Tengwar (Default)
From: [personal profile] alassenya
Good luck to your brother, I hope that psycho kitty forgets about him.

It was great to read about the concert - I feel so envious of the people who were able to go. I'm glad it went well, even with a small crowd.

Date: 2009-11-17 04:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] divinemadam.livejournal.com
Thanks for the well wishes for my brother. With psycho kitty, he needs every good thought that he can get.

The concert was sooo good! The songs weren't anything new, but many of the songs were reworked into a new sound. I have to say that I like all of them more in the new version. "Lost Direction" is my new fave and I listen to it when I need to zen out. That usually means that I keep it in my car to help me get in the right headspace in the morning and to detox after work.

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